Post Probs

Over the last few days, I've been having problems posting. I don't know what the deal is, but this makes the fifth time now. I hope this one is successful.

Clayton's party was a hit Saturday. We had about fifteen fewer people than last year, but it was still a pleasing turnout, which is important when you have two boxes of hamburgers, fifty hot dogs, three dozen doughnuts fresh from the apple orchard, a pinata, a 48-cupcake cake, and a cauldron full of "cactus juice punch." My mother didn't show up, which shouldn't surprise me because she's the moodiest person in the world. In fact, she didn't even come to the hospital when I was in labor with him even though she lives 3 miles from the hospital. She called me during one of the most climactic contractions and said (as she was yawning), "Well, give me a call sometime and let me know when he gets here." Such a caring woman.

As I type, I'm munching on leftover salsa con queso. Come to think of it, I don't know if this is a swell idea. I have to be at the hospital for a test of some type in the morning and I can't remember if I'm supposed to refrain from food for 24 hours. Oops. I'm thinking about rescheduling anyway since I know it's not what we initially thought--appendicitis. I'd started having pains in my lower right side last week and they were getting progressively worse until Saturday when I reached the pinnacle of pain. Dad told me to go to the emergency room as soon as the party was over, but that idea didn't fly with me so I called first. They suggested that I talk to my family doc first so I called her at about 9:00 that night and she said that, if it was appendicitis, I wouldn't be having an appetite. That was by no means an issue, so I scheduled an appt. for first thing Monday.

Once I was there, I realized I had a ton of things to ask about. I made it clear that I didn't want to sound like a hypochondriac, but I tend to wait until I really need to go to the doctor before I get things checked out. That will probably bite me in the butt someday, but I'm not thrilled at the idea of spending hours in a waiting room/exam room. Especially when pelvic exams are involved. Ugh. But it did turn out that I have a mass that needs antibiotics, a kidney infection, and severe hydration. I don't know how the latter was possible since I drank a huge bottle of water before I went in (I knew a urine test was inevitable), which leaves me to wonder about diabetes. It runs in my family.

Speaking of family, I have a new motto regarding them: If you can't make time to be with me now, don't bother showing up at my funeral. Sounds a bit harsh, I know, but I'm tired of making the effort to spend time with my family when so many of them are flat out asses. Aside from the fact my own mother doesn't give a shit about me or her grandson, this is a rundown of excuses I heard regarding absences for Clayton's party:

"Uncle B. has "harsh feelings" towards your dad's side of the family, so he won't be attending." Which shouldn't surprise me, either, since I've invited him to my high school graduation/open house, wedding, and other birthdays and he's never showed up, sent a card, etc. I see him once a year anyway.

"Uncle E. and Uncle P. got in a fight today at your grandma's over money so they won't be coming. They don't want to look at each other. Their kids won't be coming, either." I guess that was a good thing because they can get pretty violent. Wouldn't want a shoot-out.

"Uncle A. is at a birthday party in Indy today." Oh yeah. I'm sure it was an allll day event.

"Cousin S. won't be here because, ever since he left home and got that girl pregnant he doesn't want to be take flack from the rest of the family."

"Cousin H. decided to have a lock-in for her gymnasts tonight." This is the sixth event I've invited my once-closest cousin to, and she's always got some excuse. I had asked her to be my maid of honor in our wedding and she was going to be out of town, which really hurt.

Now I understand people have other events going on in their lives, but sometimes it strikes me as pure crap. We sent the invitations out a month early this year, and though it is just a birthday party, the excuses we got were so petty. At the very least, people could have the decency to call and let us know personally that they won't be able to make it so we can plan accordingly. It's also the idea that grown adults can't set their differences aside for a couple of hours to celebrate...not just Clayton's birthday, but also our lives--the fact we are family and have the opportunity to spend some time together. I was always envious of those who had the really close-knit families who would defend each other to the end and bend over backwards to help each other. But no. Even Steve's parents tick me off because they always show up for 10 minutes and scram. His grandparents are the same way, coming in, dropping off a card, and jetting out. In fact, I didn't even notice they were here this year until after the party when I mentioned something to Steve about it and he said, "Oh yeah, they were here but they left." (Like, could they have not said hello to me first?) But maybe I'm just selfish and get offended too easily. I just feel like that we're constantly making an effort to get together with our families and they always have some b.s. reasoning. I want to know them and I want Clayton to know them. Life is too short anyway, and the thing is, these same people who can't take two hours to visit or even a moment to call would surely take the time off from work to see me in a casket. Morbid way of looking at it, but true.