Poetry of My Youth

Last night I could have crashed when I got home, being that I pulled an all-nighter and such...but I didn't. Instead, my husband and I went to Applebee's. The in-laws watched Clayton (haaaaaalllueluuuuujah!) so we could have some quiet time. We were initially gung-ho about having free time and frothy drinks, but all we essentially ended up doing was cleaning our queen sized comforters at the laundry mat and sipping pepsi. Oh yeah. And my husband made the announcement that he's been wanting another baby for quite some time. Bummer for him, because I got other things on my agenda for the next 9 months.

So last night I was on this total ambitious high when I got home, feeling ecstatic about conquering my huge mound of homework and ready to move on to my personal list of things to do. Well, some of it technically wasn't due yet, but I wanted to clear myself for Fall Break--which I am officially on! But I've got ten thousand and two things I've been wanting to do myself, such as using my Betty Crocker Bake and Fill cookware to make a huge, vanilla pudding filled chocolate dome cake. I bought this cook set last year because it looked like a good deal and fun, though I have yet to actually use it.

Well, now I've lost the damn directions on how to make such a cake. I consulted Google, but a whopping two websites had any information whatsoever on how to make dome cakes. Sure, there's lots of websites out there trying to sell the cookware...but no freakin' recipes!

Anyway, I decided to look in this shelf of folders and papers I have. It's one of those little cubbies where you stuff documents you want to keep but rarely look at. Yeah, here's a list of a few things I ran across:

1. Christmas clings for the windows
2. Two booklets of construction paper
3. An entire folder of information I got at a "Working with Autistic Students" workshop
4. Former students' report cards--copies
5. My 9th grade Geometry folder
6. Notebooks from all the classes I took at Ball State--Western Civ., Algebra, Music History, Chemistry
7. Several sheets of music and piano pieces from the John Schaumm Piano Lesson series (dated 1946)
8. Good-bye cards my students made me when I quit teaching
9. A special good-bye card from my co-workers
10. My husband and I's baptism certificates
11. Two 8 x 10 wedding pics
12. A blueprint reading guide
13. Some newspapers I obtained when I marched in Washington, D.C.
14. A sad note I wrote to an old friend the year after we graduated high school
15. An Avon calendar from 1987
16. Stencils

And some poetry I wrote ten years ago when I had just turned 15. I wrote this one about my first love, a certain jerk who became a cop and years later told me he respected me because I was the only girl he dated who wouldn't "put out":

Untitled

The places we went,
the things we saw,
in '94, you gave me itall.
Oh what a summer we had
you looked so good; I felt so bad.
I was under your spell,
and everyone could tell.
Through our ups and downs;
smiles and frowns,
accusations, complications,
conversations and altercations.
We managed to work things out each time,
You knew I was yours;
I knew you were mine.
Off at the mall, strolls in the park,
snuck out in the morn, stayed out past dark.
It was destined to be,
that bond between you and me.
Each moment growing fonder,
yearning for eachother's touch
I knew I was a goner,
to hear your voice and such.
Remember the flowers you always brought?
the fireworks in my driveway at 2am?
Each symbolic sweet pieces,
proof of a love so kind,
Words can't express
that effect on my mind.
You told me you loved me,
proved it too.
Now you're gone, see,
and none of it was true.
I can't explain my hurt
but it's all because of you.
How can you forget me
after all we've been through?
The laughs and cries,
tears in my eyes.
You just turned cold
and let loose of the hold.

No more sunny days together,
cruises uptown, walks on peaceful streets.
It's over now.
It really is.
But know what?
I still love you...

And I always will.

And another silly first love poem about the same jerk, also written in February 1995. Read on:

Untitled

I fell hard for you
that warm night in June.
I should've known
it was way too soon.
You told me I was beautiful
and made me feel likewise.
I should've been careful
But I melted in your eyes.
I was soothed by your voice,
moved by your touch.
I had no choice,
because I wanted you so much.
That summer was nice;
it went too fast.
I paid the price,
tried to make it last.
Whatever happened with us?
Please let me know.
Why'd it have to end?
--why'd you have to go?

Crap. I still haven't found the cake recipe.